Beginning the Countdown

One month. That's all I have.
Sometimes I wonder where exactly I want to be. I'm scared to back to my country. My reality. Scared to have to wake up from this long dream.
Sometimes I long for the reality. The true life.
Though sometimes I wonder, is my true life also true?

Last night was prom night. Another one of those western culture that we, the easterners adapt, for no particular reason. What? To feel cool, so you waste your time dancing with your friends?
I wonder what the world will be like in 50 years.
After living "The American Life" for almost a year, I am beginning to realize that I don't agree with a lot of things in the society. After attending 3 dances, I'm starting to think that it's pointless. It is wicked fun and yes, you can forget your responsibilities for a while. Then what? You go home and go to bed. Or in some of the American teen's cases, you get drunk and have sex.
Then what?
You wake up knowing you still have one year of high school. Helloo...?! What's the point?
I guess once in a while, you do have to have fun, but that's just not the way. But what can I say? They've been doing this for hundreds of years. It is part of their culture.

Not mine.

And it's different if you're in America, attending a dance party, knowing that it is their culture, their habit, their life from centuries ago, to attending a dance party in Indonesia, where they play American music, which they don't even understand the meaning, not their culture, not their habit, but something they do just to think of themselves as cool, popular, but actually a run away from their reality. I mean, please... come on here guys. I don't disagree with having fun with your friends, but yes I do disagree with excessive dancing (especially when people are grinding. It's like sex with clothes on).

If we're talking about cultures, we're talking about a long period of time. It can be define as:

• an integrated pattern of human knowledge, belief, and behavior that depends upon the capacity for symbolic thought and social learning

• the set of shared attitudes, values, goals, and practices that characterizes an institution, organization or group.

(http://74.125.47.132/search?q=cache:F4lxV4cFP6gJ:en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture+culture&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=us)

I thought prom was going to be really special. Really different from other dances such as winter ball and homecoming. But, no. There's no difference except for the nomination of Prom King and Queen, but that also is pointless.

The author F Scott Fitzgerald discusses a lot about the American Culture in the period known as The Jazz Age. If you have read The Great Gatsby or watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, then you have an idea of what I'm talking about. Jazz age is a period in the 1920s, also known as The Roaring Twenties. It happened right before The Great Depression. Back then, in the twenties, American economy was rising. Life was good. Technology and automobiles were improving fast. This is also the period when Hollywood was established. The women were known to wear flappers. Jazz was introduced and until now, it is still considered the genre for the intellects. That was when women went wild and crazy, drinking, having fun with men. Before this period, women were at home in the kitchen, feeding the babies.

Anyway, I'm not going to talk about American History. (Oh, damn exams are coming up!) I'm not going to talk about anything particular either here, actually, apart from how interestingly pointless the dances are.

When I shop More than I Read

So, now you obviously know that I love reading and writing, right??
One day..I went to my town's library to get the book that I'd been wanting to read. I used the computer catalog and found the book was available. I went to the shelf that drives me nuts everytime! I'm not a crazy alphabetical order person and it confuses me! I still wanted to learn though. Just as I was telling myself, "I hope that librarian guy won't find me here and offer me help like usual because I really want to get the hang of this!" that guy saw me and said, "Need help, Nadhila?" (yes, he knew my name and that surprised me at first. Library is like the only place here to escape from reality. LOL. I often go there.)
I sighed, "Yes. I'm looking for Orhan Pam..."
"Orhan Pamuk! That should be down here!" he knealt down and got the book "Snow"
"Gee...thanks!"

When I was at the counter just about to check the book out, that librarian guy (I don't know what his name is. But he knows mine. How funny is that?) said, "Uuh...I'd like that card, but I don't think you would want to give that card to us," laughing.
I looked down to my hand and realized that instead of the library card, I pulled out my debit card!!
How embarrassing.

Being Different?

If you are living with a bunch of loving friends and loving family, people knows you and love you because they know you, you feel like you're always under the spotlight. You live in a big mansion in the middle of a garden of orchids, a swimming pool that you have your party in, but you always care for the poor. You celebrates your birthday in an orphanage, spend your time at Starbucks with a mini laptop on your lap and laughing with your friend on the phone. You are wealthy, famous, kind, and smart.

You are obviously in your comfort zone. You feel so comfortable that you never think the opposite. You wouldn't dare.

When you are immersed in a situation where everyone else value your values differently, and you realize that they are different, that you are different, I wonder who is going to survive?

Indonesia may be a nation of diversity. Diverse in a way of their languages and cultures. Their religions might be different, but it's not really obvious, is it? They ride cars, bikes, motorbikes, planes; they watch TVs and play video games. Here, in the country, let me tell you about the Amish.

The various Amish (pronounced /ˈɑːmɪʃ/, AH-mish) or Amish Mennonite church fellowships are Christian religious denominations, and they form a very traditional subgrouping of Mennonite churches. They are often best known for their simple living, plain dress and their resistance to the adoption of many modern conveniences. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amish)
In northern New York, there are a good amount of Amish people. They ride horse carts, the women wear head scarves and long black dresses, the men have long beard, always reminds me of the Middle Eastern people. They have their own school, they don't use electricity at their houses, and they work by farming and selling their crops and other skilled jobs like making wooden heaters, making pies, rattan fruit baskets, quilts, etc. And I heard, they hate it when people take pictures of them. But somehow I managed to take a video of the cart. LOL.
At first,on my first month here, I was scared I saw a woman in black walking downtown, and I found later on that she was an Amish. The Amish look scary because they are different than most Americans, than the people around them. Totally different by appearance. You will never guess that they too are Americans. The men always wear this round hat and I never wanted to see their faces, as if they might kill me with their eyes or something.

This afternoon, I walked downtown (where else do I go around here) to the Cafe because I wanted to buy some used books. As I was walking home, for the first time since in my life, I came face to face with an Amish guy. He was wearing a brown round hat, his beard goes down to his chest and he was carrying a couple of rattan baskets. I freaked out a little bit and stared down at the pathway, I thought about the middle eastern tradition that women are not allowed to look at men in the eyes, but something tells me that I have to look up. So I did. Oh my...
He might be in his twenties, he has light green eyes, light brown skin with this very smooth complexion, his smile was nice and sincere, showing his white, neat teeth, "Hi," he said in this very soft man's voice. I am not even kidding! He looked very nice and friendly. "Hi," I replied, throwing back a smile. It's like as if his eyes were...electrifying! I kept walking and glanced to my left corner. There, stood the horse and the cart, full of rattan baskets. Then I thought to myself, "Wow, I never thought, that they too are normal human beings like everybody else. Maybe even better!!" (referring to his electrifying look. LOL)

Sometimes I wonder how do they survive in the American secular community? A few months ago, the newspaper reported that an Amish cart was hit by a car, the Amish was found dead.
Other times I feel envious towards the fact that they could preserve their beliefs and tradition. They live in America but they are not affected by its society's behavior. They don't even watch TV, let alone internet! Goodness!

The western part of America, I think it's Utah and its surroundings, are also inhabited by minorities like that. Though, they are called Mormons. I shall not talk about them because I know nothing about them. LOL.
So, when you are immersed in a situation where everyone else value your values differently, and you realize that they are different, that you are different, who is going to survive?
Those who stand up to what they believe in.

Sensory Impressions

So, okay, how many senses do we have? Five. Unless you're a superstitious kind of person and might have an additional one or two senses. LOL
Obviously, our senses play a big role in our everyday life, if you haven't noticed.

A year ago, at the AFS-YES national orientation (last July), the returnees insisted that we should open up our heart and senses, absorb everything and 'fill up our cups'. Listen to what people say, pay attention, use your eyes, your ears. So I said, "Yeah, of course."
Just yesterday, I went to McDonald's and bought its apple pie. When the first bite entered my mouth, my mind wandered back to a long long time ago when I was little. Yeah, I remembered my first apple pie ate was McDonald's apple pie and that was my favorite! I don't know why the Indonesian McDonald's had stopped selling apple pies. That apple pie that I had yesterday tasted exactly like my childhood apple pie! Yeah... welcome to the marketing world.

Knowing that food is powerfully powerful, that is to fulfill my hunger, I decided to choose cooking class as one of my classes. I found out that I prefer cooking alone. A lot of people means a mess ("did you put baking powder in already?" "Oh, I swear I measured two cups of flour!" "What the...it tates like....). With that in mind, and my beloved recipes, here I go alone...


( .above. My first desert I made at home! Chocolate swirl cheesecake! It does not look perfect, I guess I used too much chocolate, but it tasted really good! ^_^ )



( .above. This is called Tortoni! My second desert! It is an Italian dessert. Took me 30 minutes to make this. Really easy and yummy!!)


(.above. The recipe calls it "Hannah's Easy Bar Cookies". But I don't know who Hannah is and it tastes like brownies. I swear I followed the recipe! So, Let's just call it "Nadhila's chocolate topped brownies. Oh, it's soooo good!!)

Other than those, I also made Gulai sapi, opor ayam, mango smoothies, chocolate chip cookies and muffins. I shall not say that I cook a lot in here, but I shall say that here I cook more than I do at home. Cooking is an art. But, I just do it because I'm always hungry. Haha..
Now wait, who would think that I will be able to cook, to face the hot oven (which I hated), the noisy swirling mixer (I hated that too), and the messiness??
Who would think that I will be able to play basketball, practising 14 hours a week?
Who? I guess I, myself think that I would never do such things. No, no, no, never. I'd rather read books, study, hang out with friends, shop, etc.

Let's just call it "Self-exploration."

Spring means FUN!!

Have I told you lately that I love Spring? dudududu...
LOL. Yes, I do! Spring here makes me want to stay here forever!! The temperature could go up to 90 degrees Fahrenheit, and people are walking their dogs, jogging with their ears plugged to their mp3 player, girls and boys walking together, sitting in the park and eating ice cream. God, it's soooooo....oh, I don't know. But you get the idea.

Here's a few snapshots I managed to take during my wonderful times!! Oh, and it feels like AMERICA!!


Us (me, Joyce, Mohsina and Nicole) hanging out after school at our favorite Ice cream house, Morgan's Ice house!!


Great time for cleaning the road with Canton Rotary Club!!


Posing in front of my school! This pic is taken at about 19:00



Us (me, Carli, Brigid and Emma) hanging out in the park!


These are just a few. My camera has loads of beautiful northern country scenery! Ha!
It's a nice day out, but darn, I have homework! Yeah, well...If only there's mas tukang bakso, es cendol, rujak, ketoprak dan tukang es keliling...Life will be a lot more colorful..